After all of the slight altercations in front of US Embassies diplomatically placed in many Arabian countries and a target for much unrest (to put it mildly) the UK have decided to take the wind out of the sails of many protestors by announcing that Sir Salman Rushdie is to become the new UK ambassador to Cairo.
David Cameron thought it would be a wise move and very diplomatic gesture towards Arabs who seem to get their knickers in a twist everytime someone dares say anything against them in the form of a film or cartoons and even books.
An apologetic Sir Salman Rushdie has accepted the offer and will be flown in in a Stealth bomber accompanied by 10 US F18's. From the airport he will join a convoy of 20 tanks, 50 armoured vehicles and a missile proof, black Mercedes.
His first meeting will be with the Israeli Prime Minister, who is also being flown into Cairo by Egyptian Airways (safe as the pyramids) and the new Egypian president, Tommy Cooper.
All three of them will show solidarity, kiss each other on the cheeks in public on the bomb-proof balcony of the UK embassy to show the marauding protestors that Monty Python was right when they sung "Always look on the bright side of life".
Maybe this will put an end end to all of this madness and if that doesn't work we'll send in Erskine Quint (who?)!