Written by queen mudder
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Friday, 31 August 2012

image for Massive Full Moon tremor scuppers Kate and Wiliam Far East freebie
Harbinger of 'Prince Philip has croaked it'??

Philippines - The 7.9-magnitude quake off Samar Island struck early this morning just as the Pisces Full Moon was waxing into maximum display.

Its aftershocks have rattled Kate and William's Far East holiday plans for yet another taxpayer-funded freebie promoting, er, themselves.

At Buckingham Palace the Queen's astrologers have warned of the symbolic effects of the Philippines rattler.

"It could be a cosmic euphemism for 'Prince Philip's had a heart attack' we reckon," the Lord Chamberlain Lord Luce-Cannon tweeted from the throne room.

"Bound to happen given it's exactly 15 years since he saw off Diana - er...heard the shocking news of his ex-daughter-in-law's death!"

Also affected are Ring of Fire countries such as Taiwan, Guam, Japan, Papua New Guinea, Northern Mariana Islands and Yap where the royal party had designs on visiting.

A tsunami warning has been issued and holiday makers are being evacuated.

An alternative royal trip to Grimsby remains an attractive - and much cheaper - proposition.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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