A hippo, trapped in a swimming pool in South Africa was actually their secret weapon for the Olympics! Unfortunately it got trapped before the Olympics begun and the South African authorities just could not remove the poor thing in time!
The hippo was being trained as their star athlete to at least win one gold medal. It was being coached by star hippo swimmer trainer, Blanche De Vauderville, who also trains circus seals by the way! The stuck hippo was clocking up times not even achieved by Michael Phelps who was too busy smoking pot, but that's another story.
Just before the rest of the team left for London, a crane was ordered to heave the hippo out of the pool, but it refused to budge unless the South African Olympic committee satisfied it's contractual demands; 600000 Rand, a villa with a huge outside swimming pool and several horny female hippos not Rhinos; they refused so the hippo stayed put and got stuck!
Unfortunately it is now dead because they attempted to give it a tranquilliser and it's heart failed due to several mysterious substances fed to it during training. It's nickname was Lance; explains everything actually!
South Africa were desperate to win a swimming gold for the first time in their history; they failed, but next time they are going to train an Ostrich to stuff Usain Bolt in the 100 metres; no contest!!!