Written by Paxton Quigley
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Tuesday, 5 June 2012

image for Berlusconi Confesses to "Merkel Fantasy"
Berlusconi's fantasy girl

He once confided to his minions that she is an "unfuckable lard-arse" but a more romantic side to former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi has been revealed in a forthcoming magazine article.

Despite that much reported off the cuff insult, in an open and frank interview with one of his gentlemen's magazines "Rumpipumpi!", Signor Berlusconi confesses to finding German Chancellor Angela Merkel a bit of a "prostituta sexy" and having a "fantasia" about her. He further admits that to him Frau Merkel's "barbone grasso è eccitante" (tr. ample bottom is intriguing) and that after one European Union summit he was so enchanted that he had hired a trio of BBW Merkel lookalikes complete with trouser suits and wigs for a private "bunga bunga" session at his official residence, the Palazzo Chigi. Signor Berlusconi had worn Lederhosen for the encounter.

Giggling to the interviewer he claimed that the German government wanted to "scopare con" (tr. f*ck with) Greece and Italy, so he had wanted to do the same with them and that this was his way of taking revenge, but "in un modo piacevole" (tr. in a nice way).

When asked for the German Chancellor's reaction to the magazine article, Frau Merkel's spokesperson crooked his little finger while saying that Signor Berlusconi is a "funny little man" and declined to comment further.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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