After roughly half a million years of hatred and war, mankind have finally packed it in.
The abrupt move from 'pretty dismal' to 'just groovy' occurred after someone at Cheney School, Oxford, asked during lunch break, "Why don't we just stop all the fighting? It'd make so much sense."
The anonymous philosopher agreed to The Spoof. She explained, "I was just watching the news, and it was all the same stuff - war, suffering, euthanasia, Africa, that sort of thing. And I just thought…why don't we just not do that? I reckon it'd be reasonably simple."
People across the world didn't immediately cease violence, anger and general unpleasantness; there was a time gap as the words were translated from language to language. But by around 20.00 - 20.30, most of the world's humans were being pretty decent people, and reflecting how despicable they had been.
Prime Minister David Cameron said in a speech this afternoon, "Four 24 Hour news channels have stopped broadcasting, and generally there's just a great vibe.
"I've started to learn the guitar."
All 92 Nobel Prizes given annually to 92 different laureates have been stripped from those they were awarded to and melted down into a single 18.4kg Medal, in recognition of the brilliance of one 15-year-old Student. Eat that, Nietzsche.
The teenage philosopher reflected, "I'm amazed the thought hadn't crossed anyone's mind before now."