Hitherto thought lost, it transpires that Hitler's brain has been found in a jar in a former government laboratory in Moscow. The unexpected find was unearthed by - ironically - a German Professor, named Doctor Helmut Haller, who was clearing out some rubbish prior to the former laboratory being converted into a lapdancing club, operated by the Russian Mafia.
Doctor Haller's assistant, Wolfgang Weber, later reported that the doctor appeared shocked and stunned, as he discovered the brain, floating in formaldehyde in a bell jar, and how the doctor almost fell into a dead faint as he opened a letter which had been taped to the jar.
It was later revealed that the letter confirmed that the brain was indeed that of the one time German dictator, and that under no circumstances should the brain ever be released into the custody of the Germans.
It was signed by Joseph Stalin.
Russian Mafia spokesman, Nikita Orlowski said that the outfit would give the brain pride of place in the new lapdancing club's men's room.
"It's what he would have wanted," Orlowski told reporters.
More as we get it.