Written by MonkeyInTheBath
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Thursday, 19 January 2012

image for Dinosaurs discovered in the Falklands
That should keep the Argies out, if they really exist (the dinosaurs not the Argies)

Prehistoric reptiles have been discovered roaming wild in the Falkland Islands, a UK government scientist announced today, to the great surprise of the zoological world. The dinosaurs include T-Rex's, Stegosauri, and other dangerous creatures once thought extinct. They are mostly living on the uninhabited islands of the group. The two main Falkland Islands, imaginatively named East Falkland and West Falkland, are dinosaur-free.

When asked why these creatures had not been discovered before, a spokesman said that the islands were very remote and sparsely inhabited. It was quite believable that enormous creatures could have survived there unnoticed for thousands of years.

As a result of the discovery, the UK has placed an exclusion zone around the islands. This is to protect the animals, and also to prevent any unwary travellers from accidentally finding themselves the victim of a Jurassic Park-style mauling. Falkland Island natives are to be allowed to stay, but everyone else is advised to keep their distance. This particularly applies to Argentinian diplomats who were planning a trip to the islands this week to try to open negotiations on the islands' future.

A UK diplomat due to meet the Argentian delegation this week said, "It's a shame really, what unfortunate timing! I'm afraid this discovery closes the argument about the future of the Falklands and their potential oil supplies once and for all. We can't possibly let the islands change hands now. The Falklands is now officially a prehistoric zoo under the protection of the UK, and it will have to stay that way forever."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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