Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 14 January 2012

image for Cameron denies eating roast bald eagle with King Abdullah in Saudi desert feast
Needs a lot of plucking and evisceration first, can be a bit chewy for some palates

Riyadh, Saudi Arabia - "That's total and utter hogwash," the PM's aide told reporters this evening, "besides, it wasn't bald per se, just slightly thinning."

"It's the Bedu equivalent of the Thanksgiving turkey," Our-Man-In-Riyadh's calorie counter commented, "they cook it à la grecque** over hot coals in a light herby batter; tastes a lot like grouse or snipe."

Tender morsels of the local delicacy were on the Saudis table d'hôte menu last night as David Cameron chewed the cud with Crown Prince Nayif under brilliantly starry Wadi Hadhramaut skies.

A series of inter-course (there were a dozen!) amuse-bouches included snake tartare and toucan pie.

The Al fresco House of Saud dinner eventually ended with a pot of desert brew said to work equally well as an embalming fluid or long term alternative to the gastric band.

"Contract's in the bag, heheh!" Cameron chucked up - er...chuckled! - on the blower to Sam during the Queen's Flight home.

A $50 billion kit-out of dated Royal Saudi Navy destroyers sees the foundering UK arms industry cock-a-hoop.

And a cunning plot hatched to cook Mahmoud Ajmadinejad's goose will see the pesky Iranian president soon eat crow.

**Gorgon Ramsey's personal recipe demands marinading the eagle for at least 24 hours in a chablis/rosemary/juniper jus; vegetarian option available.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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