Written by mikewadestr
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Friday, 16 December 2011

image for Al Qaeda to Change name to "Really Cool Dudes with Beards, Turbans and Weapons"
We're really cool dudes once you get to know us/

In order to remake its image and distance itself from the whole aspect of terrorism, Al Qaeda has announced that they have changed their name to Really Cool Dudes with Beards, Turbans and Weapons or RCDBTW.

"We want everyone to know that we are really the good guys and not the bad guys anymore", explained RCDBTW leader Ali Bombed-Em. "We want everyone to know that we have changed and want nothing to do with the 'T' word anymore".

"We are just like everyone in America now, with the exception that we don't pepper spray people before we shoot them. We, also, find hand grenades to be much more effective on crowds of shoppers during high volume shopping days such as Black Friday"

RCDBTW has created a set of YouTube videos to help transform their image from hard line terrorists to just a bunch of normal everyday guys who are tolerant of other peoples' religious and political views who like to wear turbans instead of baseball caps.

Their YouTube videos have been internet sensations and include such titles as:

You da Budda,
Taoism for Two
Do the Cold Fusion with Confucius
Let's Jump for Jesus
There's no Bin Laden in our Garden
Mulling with Mohammed
Seventy-two Virgins to Play in my Hay
Santa Shoots Bad People Too

Throughout the eclectic religious videos Ali Bombed-Em and other members of RCDBTW are shown walking through the exotic bombed out parts of Afghanistan and Iraq, playing air rifles and donning various clothing and artifacts from all of the world's major religions.

Reaction in America has been very positive as can be shown by the high demand for AK-47 rifles and Koran Cliff Notes.

It has even been rumored that Newt Gingrich has been so impressed with the transformation that he has been shopping around town for a turban and a fake beard.

In other news it has been announced that Hezbollah has changed its name to Hell's Bollahs and is now a biker gang.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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