Written by queen mudder
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Monday, 3 October 2011

image for WTF 'Some' IRA Killings Could Be Murder: McGuinness??
On the phone to his old mucker Gerry Adams about joining him as his presidential Veep

Belfast - Sinn Fein presidential wannabe Martin McGuinness is off his trolley worried voters said today as his knowledge of the criminal justice system hit the headlines.

Speaking to UK broadsheet reporters the former IRA hitman said people were bound to jump to conclusions about things that happened during The Troubles.

"It's all so subjective, like," McGuinness uttered, "but some 'accidental' IRA killings of civilians could be described as 'murders' - depending on your point of view, of course."

Gardai sources had long suspected that hundreds of 'victims' might have died by mistake, aides explained, because of poor communication skills among the Provos.

Asked about Colonel Gaddafi's semtex shipments that supplied Irish bomb makers with their choice ingredients McGuiness looked baffled:

"Don't blame the Colonel now he's down and out," the presidential candidate retorted, "especially seeing as Mrs Thatcher was in charge of all import-export business within the Common Market."

Online spread betting index Aintgottaprayer.con rate McGuinness' chances as 69/1.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 multiplied by 5?

9 19 15 2

Go to top