Written by UWGB-Beek
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Thursday, 8 September 2011

Rick Perry doesn't think the world is becoming warmer, it is just becoming nicer for people that enjoy wearing shorts.

"I don't believe that goofy theory of global warming. There was this really cool guy called Galileo, yeah, I read all his books, and he had this crazy theory that the world was created by God and every once and a while a large group of scientist would lie to get money. Yeah, and he said by decoding the Bible he was able to say with a great certainty that God said global warming was lies perpetrated by the devil. Sure, the Catholic Church hated the guy for saying that stuff without collecting money for it and he suffered for it in the polls." Rick Perry said during the debate on Wednesday night.

When asked if he thought the he was Galileo, Perry said, "I am just a simple guy that prays to God and enjoys weather that won't make my hair frizzy. I also know people out there don't believe the lies of scientist who have numbers to backup their theories, and would rather believe in stuff that can't be proven without taking money from polluters, so yes, I do consider myself to be the Galileo of my time."

Rick Perry also said he didn't believe Obama was an alien.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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