Written by UWGB-Beek
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Topics: Senate

Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Washington--Senator Ron Johnson of Wisconsin promised that he would fix America and that he would work hard to fix the tax code, but that was just doublespeak for hiding in his office, while staring at his poster of Ayn Rand.

"I spent a lot of energy trying to sound like a Tea Party guy when I was running against Russ Feingold, and I made a lot of promises, but the people that elected me shouldn't be surprised I don't like to work. I married a rich woman so I didn't have to work, and now I have a nice government job where I really don't have to do anything for four or five years. I can't remember how many years a Senator is in office." Ron Johnson told Spoof reporters.

Ron Johnson isn't an ambitious man when it comes to fixing America and the tax code he knows so much about because of his accounting background; however, he likes to talk a lot about fixing the tax code, he hasn't introduced any bills to fix it. He really hasn't introduced any bills to the Senate, except one that would end federal regulations until employment reaches 7.7percent.

Ron Johnson might think people collecting unemployment are lazy because they can't find a job, but he doesn't think he is lazy for just collecting a government check for doing nothing all day, except for showing up to his office.

"It usually takes years for a politician to realize that it is bad for their political future to introduce legislation, to laypeople it might seem lazy, but for someone that wants to make a career of politics, it is pure genius. Just look at Obama, he did the least, but talked the most, and critics really had no ammunition against him, so he was able to talk his way into the White House." Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell said.

Ron Johnson did say that once he was done reading "Atlas Shrugged," which he started when Congress was on vacation, that he hoped to maybe introduce some legislation on some important social issues of the day, but wouldn't give specifics on what social issues.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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