Written by Michael Balton
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Wednesday, 17 August 2011

image for Congressional tour bus veers to the right and then to the left before crashing

Puddinpop, Virginia -- Congressional leaders have embarked on a cross country bus tour of the nation designed to put them in closer touch with the voting public.

The journey is said to be in response to a Gallup poll which shows that over 8 out of 10 Americans disapprove of Congress.

Unfortunately, only minutes after the trip began, the bus skidded out-of-control and flipped over on a Virginia interstate.

Miraculously, no one was injured in the crash. An initial accident scene investigation indicated that the majority of the 38 passengers landed on their wallets.

"It just goes to show that you don't need airbags to protect these windbags," said tow truck operator Zed Lipsky. "They appear to be very well insulated."

A preliminary analysis of the cause of the crash was also released. "First, John Boehner tells me to make a sharp right," said bus driver Billy Hutchens.

"Then Nancy Pelosi orders me to hang a left. That got them started arguing, but they're so boring, I must've dozed off…"

Voting in a half-filled drainage ditch, the legislative leaders unanimously approved a plan to charter a new bus and continue the tour, which is themed "Journey To Listen To America's Vision."

"We're not going to give up on the American people," House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) said. "We need to reward that 13% who gave us a positive approval in the Gallup poll. And I'm prepared to visit every country club in America if that's what it takes to do so."

Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-California) expressed concern that the replacement bus would not be as environmentally friendly as the tour's original coach was. "I don't know how they did it, but that bus ran entirely on hot air."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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