WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama recently told his mama-in-law that he cannot believe how gray his hair is getting.
His mother-in-law Marian Shields Robinson told him that if he gets any grayer he is going to start looking like he could be Michelle's daddy instead of her husband.
According to the presidential "First Maid" Novela Lagartos the president did not like hearing that and suggested that maybe (his mother-in-law) could run over to the grocery store and pick up a bottle of Grecian Formula.
Mrs. Robinson's eyes got big and she reportedly replied, "Say what? Now Barry duz ya sees me wearing an Olympic track and field jersey or what?"
"Well no ma'am I don't but I just figured dat since you be livin' her wiff us fa free and all dat ju wouldn't mind doing me dat little favor."
Mrs. Robinson shook her head. She took a sip of her glass of Bud Light and remarked to her son-in-law that he needed to call up (Joe) Biden and get him to run to the store since he really doesn't do much anyway.
The president pointed out that Vice-President Biden does do a lot and that he does 95 percent of his vice-presidential duties on the computer.
"Like what?" Mrs. Robinson asked sternly. "Dat man does nuttin all day but sit on his honky ass and read Sports Illustrated Magazine, watch ESPN Sports on TV, and do crossword puzzles."
The president told her that she was mistaken.
She fired back that she was not mistaken and then she told him that she knows one thing that she isn't mistaken about and that it was something that her daughter Michelle had confided in her about him the other evening while they were watching America's Got Talent.
The president turned white or actually light gray. "You mean 'bout me sleeping in Spiderman underwear?"
"You mean 'bout me being afraid of da dark and having ta have a Sponge Bob Square Pants Night Lite on in our bedroom?"
"Well den pray tell me woman what da hell is you going on about, dis ain't friggin Jeopardy dammit."
"Barry Hussein Sylvester Obama, don't ju cuss and raise jur effen voice at me, ju ain't talkin' to dat cracker bitch Ann "Giddy Up" Coulter or dat hunting white ditzy fool from da North Pole Sarah "Polar Bear Balls" Palin."
The president shook his head. He told him mother-in-law to go back to sewing that sofa she's been working on for three months and that he would get dressed and run down to the grocery store and get the damn Grecian Formula himself.
She told him to get Biden to fetch it for him.
He told her that he was taking a nap. He then suggested that she sit her ass down and simmer down before he called Novela to force feed her some Valium like she had done a week ago Friday.
Mrs. Robinson grinned as she told her son-in-law to bring her back a Baby Ruth.
SIDENOTE: President Obama has invited Eva Longoria, one of the stars of The Desperate Housewives, to next Wednesday's White House Mexico Food Dinner Night.