On the day the US economy sunk to it's lowest levels with a 512 point sell off on the Dow, a race riot in Milwaukee, and 4 teens shooting up a bus in Philadelphia with an automatic weapon in broad daylight, the Rose Garden came alive as the President celebrated his birthday....for the 5th time in two days!
The catered event for an elite, and secret guest list of about 200, were treated to an African version of an Italian Bunga-Bunga party, not to say members of the bent nose crowd weren't represented.
In addition to barbecue there was a selection of the finest Californian wines, not the ones with the screw off tops, by the way, those are being reserved for the DNC convention in North Carolina, the one next to the bus stop where Obama delegates will be arriving.
It was only thanks to a disgruntled staff member who didn't get tipped for catering to
the crowd, that some details of the event are leaking out.
Among the attendees was Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid who showed up in madras shorts and a Hawaiian shirt, calf length black socks and wing tips, arm in arm with a gorgeous Las Vegas show girl, thanks to the thoughtfulness of the SEIU Vegas employee's union.
Recently retired congressman David Wu was seen paying his respects to Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner, and giving him his latest address, email and bank wire transfer number to ensure his government pension, calculated at $1m would arrive on time until the day he dies.
Sticking close to Hillary Clinton, Huma Weiner was seen clinging to the arm of her
disgraced, and since 'retired' husband A. Weiner who had trouble tearing himself away from his own image in the White House pool. According to an eye witness, both were proudly sporting a 'baby bump.'
Reverend Al Sharpton wasted no time jumping into the spirit of things to the rousing DJ
show, grabbing Michelle and launching into a smoking dirty dancing routine after off handedly commenting to the First Lady, "did you really need to invite all these Jews?"
Not cutting him any slack while belly bumping him back, Michelle was heard to
spit, "It's about the MONEY, Stupid!"
Nancy Pelosi was hanging around the open bar enjoying some tropical drinks decorated with Dole Pineapple chunks telling everyone, " I just love Del Monte...and they love Me..together we're going to save the planet for the rest of the fruits...!"
Bo the dog even got into the festivities, taking turns humping the very thick ankles of Hillary, Sonja Sotomayor, Janet Napilatano, and Elena Kagan as they queued up behind the President for the "Electric Glide", a group participation thing where everyone follows the teleprompter and repeats the same talking points without missing a beat.
Jet setting Robert Mugabe spent most of the evening talking Voodoo with Fist Mother In Law, Marion Robinson, and the two later disappeared after dessert for what Michelle deemed ' a private skull session."
There were several NFL football stars present, who had gotten a note from Barry to skip training camp curfew, although a line backer from the Ravens was denied entrance after he refused to give up his cocked and locked Glock discovered in his shorts during a security pat down by a comely intern for the TSA.
At the close of the party the contingent from Hollywood all joined hands and did
'Hava Nagila' before they put their envelopes in the collection plate. Whoopi Goldberg was the only African-American-Princess to participate which shocked the Congressional Black Caucus members attending, with Sheila Jackson Lee, speaking for the group, saying, "Whoopi is giving us a bad name...next thing you know she'll be a spokesman for one of those payday loan companies....!"
The party eventually broke up about 11:30 when the lawn sprinklers came on, and the President and First Lady retired for the night to review the video and count the
gifts which our source said, "was probably over a million in small bills!"
The secret service took the left overs and threw them over the fence to a horde of hungry by standers, mostly taxpayers, who said they had been waiting for over 3 years for the
President "to throw us a bone!"