Written by snorkyadams
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Thursday, 28 July 2011

Washington DC: Supporters of alternative energy lobby group Americans For Long Term Renewable Energy have flocked to the nation's capital this week, calling on congress to introduce legislation limiting America's reliance on the sun.

The group's spokesperson Tania Hawker, called congress short sighted, and claimed that America's over-reliance on finite resources would leave a crippling legacy once the sun implodes.

"The point at which the sun reaches its peak hydrogen consumption is impending and it is essential that we as a nation are prepared for that day"

And it seems that the group has the support of the scientific community. Earlier this week professor Michael Roberts, head of astrophysics at MIT spoke out in support of the group.

"Yeah, well I guess nothing is eternal, the sun has been around for about 4.7 billion years, that is about half of its 10 billion year life-cycle."

It's widely believed that when the sun exhausts the hydrogen at its inner core it will expand outwards consuming close orbiting planets such as Mercury.

Professor Roberts predicts that it will be at this stage that the sun will descend towards a state known as a Planetary Nebula, at which point it will implode.

It is at this point critics of the solar energy industry believe that the sun will no longer be a viable source of safe renewable energy.

"Once the sun has expended its fuel load, all of our investment in solar power become useless," said Ms Hawker

"The time for action is now, today I call on the American people to stand up and demand change."

"By 2015 the solar energy industry will power almost half a million American homes, it's madness"

The sudden influx of members of Americans For Long Term Renewable Energy into Washington has raised a few eyebrows among locals.

Tom Harlow, owner of a local electronics store encountered a group of long term renewable energy advocates earlier this week.

"This guy came into the shop looking to buy a video camera and he asked whether the lifetime warranty would cover the cameras descent into entropy."

"He just kept rambling on a about molecules not being infinitely binding"

"I mean, how can I be held responsible for the second law of thermodynamics?" he said

Protesters were last seen converging on congress with placards sporting the numbers 1.83 x 10 (12) The number of days until the sun begins its transformation into a red giant.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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