Written by mikewadestr
Print this
Topics: casey anthony

Monday, 18 July 2011

image for Police Refuse to Disclose that Casey Anthony is Hiding out in a House on Florida's Diamond Isle
We won't tell you that this is a picture of the beach near Casey Anthony's beachhouse.

Sergeant Donald AfterThought, disclosed to an anxious press that he, nor any of the people involved with the release of Casey Anthony, will never disclose that she is staying in a small secluded beach house on Florida's Diamond Isle.

"Listen", proclaimed AfterThought to the crowded press gathered around him. "For the protection of Casey Anthony, we cannot tell you that she is staying at 3231 Elisson Drive, Diamond Isle which is a secluded beach house with light blue shutters on the front windows and cedar shingle siding on the outside".

"If we told you her cell phone number is 555-674-8662 people would barrage her with a constant stream of threatening phone calls, so, don't get your hopes up on getting that information".

"We are definitely not going to tell you the beach house she is staying in has a broken lock on the back door or that the house consists of just a living room, a small kitchen, a full bath and one bedroom that is located on its right side when facing the front of the beach house".

"We absolutely will not tell you she never leaves the grounds of the beach house and always wears a long blonde wig and big bug-eyed sunglass whenever she is outside on the porch or answers the door for the delivery guy who delivers food from the local Piggly Wiggly supermarket. The fact that the delivery guy comes every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 2:00PM and is dressed in one of those striped outfits with the Piggly Wiggly name and logo on it is really no one's business but ours and Casey Anthony's".

"Another detail that will remain secret is the beach house is completely unguarded and there is actually another pathway into the beach house which can be accessed just from Johnson road which lies beyond the pine trees behind the house. Also, if we told everyone that she has no weapons in the house and no way to defend herself, her security and well being would be greatly compromised".

"Thank you for your time and have a nice day".

Make mikewadestr's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.

Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 4 multiplied by 1?

8 25 4 11
50 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more