BEVERLY HILLS - President Obama was in town speaking before the annual convention of the Left Coast Hair Stylists Society.
FuFi Fondue, owner of The Haven of Hair Salon on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills is the Society's president and he sat at the honorees table with President Obama, Vice-President Joe Biden, and the vice-president of the Left Coast Hair Stylists Society Jose Jose of San Jose.
Tapioca Swizzle who covered the event for Tittle Tattle Tonight noted that the president was drinking a Bud Light, the vice-president was drinking a Dos Equis, FuFi was drinking a Mango/Guava Margarita, and Jose Jose was sipping on a Frozen Pomegranate Daiquiri.
President Obama got up to speak. He told the assembled crowd estimated to be at about 800 that he was glad to be there although he had never been around so many people who use words like sweety, honey, darling, cupcake, swishy, bitch ass, ho lips, lick, and tickle tongue.
The president was asked what he thought about Congressman Anthony Weiner. He smiled and said that he would not be touching that subject. He was then asked about Arnold Schwarzenegger's love child which he fathered with his maid.
President Obama smiled as he took a sip of his Bud Light and said, "Now lissen up girls" and the place erupted in applause. "I want all of y'all ta know dat sum GOPers will go ta any length ta find a way ta get mo Republican votes."
He was asked about LeBron James and he replied, "Well truth be told da boy needs ta stop actin' like he already be Michael Jordan cause right now da little bro he's just Michael Jordan's left one, if y'all gits my drift."
Fondue then asked him what he thinks about Donald Trump. The president smiled and took two sips of his beer. He paused and then he took two more.
"Well" he said shaking his head, "It is no secret dat I does not like da cracker dude one damn bit. And since he embarrassed me wiff his constant BS about my birth certificate I am right now gonna tell all you fine ladies [THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE] dat I am officially gonna condemn da hell outta his damn hairdo."
The president continued by saying, "And as a presidential directive goes, if he continues wearing dat silly honky ass hairdo out in public den I will have no choice but ta have da FBI arrest his arrogant GOP butt and incarcerate it for obstruction of justice, misappropriation of information, and wanton neglect.
The crowd went crazy. They stated shouting out O-BA-MA! O-BA-MA! O-BA-MA! in high shrilled voices. The president thanked them and told them to enjoy the rest of the evening and to have fun dancing to the old 70s band The Village People.
Tapioca Swizzle said that President Obama and Vice-President Biden actually got up on stage and sang "Macho Man" with the band.