Written by Michael Balton
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Saturday, 2 July 2011

image for Senate bans summer vacations for all Americans

Washington, DC - "If we Senators have to miss out on our summer vacations, then everyone is going to miss out on their summer vacations."

Those angry words came from Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, as he gaveled home a law which prohibits American citizens from taking summer vacations this year.

The action was in response to the Senate's cancellation of its month-long summer recess, a move requested by Pres. Obama.

Called the "Hot Time In the Summer Initiative," the new law makes it a crime to take any time off from your job during the summer months.

What's more, the legislation requires that any money earned during the forced work periods must be sent to the federal government to pay off the deficit.

"We're killing two birds with one stone here," Reid said. "The main reason we canceled the Senate's one-month recess is to work on reducing the deficit. The extra money Americans earn by working through their vacations should put a dent in the debt. Don't you just love it when things work out that way?"

Travel and hospitality industry executives were less impressed. They warned that their companies will be hard hit by the Senate's initiative, possibly triggering another recession.

"This is our busiest time of year," said Bertha Gumson, a self-employed personal comfort worker from Orlando. "What kind of trick is this?"

But Reid said the Senate will be working on a special bailout plan that will protect businesses that rely on leisure travelers. "It will take us a little over a month to put this together," Reid told the Washington press corps.

"The funding will come from the extra dollars Americans earn by not taking vacations. So we are going full circle on this. Does anyone need two first-class tickets to Aruba?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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