Written by Michael Balton
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Saturday, 18 June 2011

image for Weiner booked on Broadway; performs his own stunts in "Tweeting Memories: The Tangled Web"
Weiner's costar.

Shut out of politics by a cyber sex scandal, former Congressman Anthony Weiner has landed on Broadway. The ex-politician stars in a one-man show based on his adventures as America's lewdest lawmaker.

Titled "Tweeting Memories: The Tangled Web," the play begins with Weiner as a young college student who is bitten by an Internet spider. The virtual venom turns him into an online exhibitionist and inexplicably causes him to swing from wires strategically positioned throughout the theater.

"We got some great deals on the stunts they took out of the Spider-man musical," said Julie Taymor, who is directing the Weiner production. "They were deemed too dangerous for that show, but Anthony loves flying around the theater in his underwear."

The plot progresses as one young woman after another victimizes the hero by responding to his lurid tweets and emails. But Weiner survives the onslaught by seeking refuge in a treatment center for egomaniacs.

Spoiler alert: The production ends rather abruptly, when one of Weiner's wires snaps, causing him to plunge 32 feet into the theater's empty orchestra pit. A continuing chorus of sobs and moans accompanies the audience as it exits the theater, a reminder of the absolute travesty of this production.

"Tweeting Memories: The Tangled Web" is scheduled to run all summer at the Little Theatre Around the Corner, located in the East Village. The show may then tour the dinner theater circuit, if its nausea rating can be reduced.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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