Written by Gail Farrelly
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Topics: Zoo, hats, Bronx, Peacocks

Friday, 13 May 2011

image for Bronx Zoo Peacock Discusses Life Over the Fence
The grass is always greener..........

The female peacock who escaped from the Bronx Zoo, but was captured after a few days, held a press conference at the zoo today. She said that her freedom was okay while it lasted, but she had always meant it to be just a brief sabbatical.

She made a couple of things clear as she preened for reporters. The accurate way to describe her, she said, is as a green peahen, not a peacock. "Get your vocabulary straight," she sternly instructed the group. "If you don't know the difference between a male and a female, maybe you should take a few sex ed classes."

The peahen wasn't overly impressed with the streets of the Bronx. "It's a jungle out there!" she proclaimed. She also admitted that "It ain't easy being green."

She confided that, having seen on TV the wide array of hats at the Royal Wedding, she had briefly thought about flying to London and getting a unique job as a live ornament on a hat. "That would have really knocked the socks off those uptight Brits," she chuckled.

Before ending the press conference, the peahen gave out with a loud Bronx cheer, which startled all those in attendance. "I did it for fun, just because I could," she told her friends afterwards. "It gave me a good laugh."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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