Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 11 May 2011

image for The World's Number One Porn Star Ron Jeremy Confesses That After Two Dates Pippa Middleton Has Asked Him To Marry Her
A view of the Cabo San Lucas beach from Ron Jeremy's 'Presidential Suite.'

CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - Ron Jeremy, the world's most famous porn star, was down in Cabo San Lucas relaxing by the pool at The Whole Enchilada Hotel and Spa.

He was asked by Polo Del Matador, a reporter for The Cabo San Lucas Morning Ole News how he was doing. He replied that he was fine.

Del Matador asked him who his new lady friend was. Jeremy smiled as he took a shot right out of his bottle of Tres Cuartro Y Cinco Tequila.

He told him that she was none other than Pippa Middleton. Del Matador said that he had heard of her. Wasn't she the broad that Russell Brand was boinking before he met Katy Perry.

Jeremy shook his head and said that, that was Playboy Playmate Holly Madison. He then told Del Matador that Pippa Middleton is the sister of Kate Middleton, who married Prince William and is now known as The Duchess of Cambridge.

Del Matador started laughing and said that he guesses it's all kind of like one big giant chess set.

Ron nodded and told him that, that was a good way of putting it. He then told Polo that he was going to give him an exclusive. Polo's eyes got the size of white marshmallows.

Jeremy told him that he and Pippa had only been in Cabo San Lucas for two days and she has already proposed to him.

Del Matador could not believe it. He then thought about one of Jeremy's X-Rated porn movies that he had seen with his then girlfriend and now wife, Sopapilla, and he remarked that he could see that.

When asked what he had replied, Jeremy said that he told Pippa that he wanted for them to get to know each other a little better before tying the knot and being committed to one person for the rest of their lives.

Just then Pippa walked in. She had been shopping down at the local market. She showed Ron the Spanish Flamenco hat that she had purchased. He asked her if she had remembered to buy the condoms.

Pippa smiled, opened her purse, walked over to the bed, and poured out a bag containing two dozen condoms.

Ron Jeremy revealed that he will be returning back to the states in three days where he will begin filming his cold war - spy drama epic, 'Tit For Tat 2: The Caressing Years.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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