Written by Ellie James
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Tuesday, 26 April 2011

image for Texas Legislature Votes for Product Placement in Texas Classrooms
Students in this Home Economics class will soon receive ads from Bartles and James Wine Coolers and Tampax Tampons

Fort Worth: In order to help bring more money into the educational system in Texas, the legislature has voted on a bill that would allow product placement and ad wraps in classrooms.

Product placement has become popular in movies and American television for years. "It makes sound financial sense to endorse product placement in Texas schools," claims Representative Joe Bob Smith of Lubbock.

Texas wants to use the money to pay teachers so that 100,000 school teachers don't lose their jobs next year. With the surplus the ads are expected to bring, they hope to buy books.

Parents and teachers have mixed feelings about the idea. Karen Esposito, 25 of North Richland Hills and mother of twin boys in the second grade states, "While I'm thrilled that the money generated will be able to buy books for the kids, I am not really sure if I want my 7 year old boys to come home from school asking for a Miller Lite."

Fifth grade teacher, Janice LaPont of Fort Worth states, "I don't really want to wear an add wrapped around my torso for Trojan condoms. I'd much rather wear a cute t-shirt with milk or an e-reader. You know, something wholesome."

The Ad Wrap, Inc., a local company that designs and prints Ad Wraps confirms that there are about a million or so Ad Wraps that will be used to wrap around teacher's bodies, wipe off boards, teacher's desks, as well as school buses."

Says Jonathan Fortner, CEO of Ad Wrap Inc says, "Research shows time and time again that wrapping a car in ads will bring in revenue to the company that's being advertised. I'm thrilled to be bringing this to the public schools."

Product placement will begin the following school year in all public and charter schools. If it is as successful as they think it will be, lawmakers plan on changing the names of schools and allowing companies to use their names and logos for a fee. This is much like what sports arenas do now.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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