Written by Alexf505
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Topics: Police, Kool-Aid

Sunday, 24 April 2011

image for Man Found Unconscious in Red Kool-Aid Destroys Police Hope

San Antonio, Texas - Police arrived on the scene at the home of Lance Greegs after his neighbor called police because Lance has not turned up his crappy music, to the point where she could hear it from her living room, lately.

Police entered his home after using the spare key under the doormat marked "Spare Key Under Here." When they proceed to the kitchen, they found him in a puddle of red liquid to what the police suspected to be blood. "We instantly believed it was blood" stated Police Chief Daniel Blunter.

Upon further investigation, one of the officers noticed sugar particles in the red substance. After tasting it, the officer confirmed that it was Kool-Aid.

"This really was a bummer for the San Antonio Police Department." Daniel Blunter spoke. "We had hope that we would be able to solve a crime for once, just like they do in our favorite show CSI: New York."

The man apparently had diabetes and his blood sugar was low so he decided to make some Kool-Aid, but passed out right there, spilling the unmixed Kool-Aid.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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