Vice President Joe Biden has been catching flack in the media for falling asleep in public during a presidential address last week. In a press release, White House spokesman David Kronauer admitted that the V.P. was only nodding off because "he missed his nap time that afternoon."
According to Kronauer, "we always schedule time each day for Mr. Biden to take his nap. This often puts a break in cabinet meetings or Senate sessions, but it is important to keeping his temper cooled down. When he gets up from his nap, he generally joins the Obama girls for their after school milk and cookies."
One of his personal secretaries was surprised that he was able to fall asleep, as "at the Naval Observatory, he usually has to have his teddy bear, wear his footie jammies, and have one of us read him a bedtime story to get him to take his nap like a good boy."
When asked if it was possible that Biden fell asleep because he was bored with the President and had seen the teleprompter speech before, the White House had no comment. They also refused to confirm the rumor that Biden wore Depend undergarments when taking his naps and that Secret Service Agents were required to change these.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was upset about the nap. "How dare he fall asleep! If I was Vice President, I wouldn't fall asleep! I'd take the job with a much greater degree of seriousness, just like I'll campaign for the nomination with much more seriousness and wakefulness!"