Written by Mark Lowton
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Saturday, 4 October 2003

image for Arnie - 'I Just Love Boobs'
Boobies?!

Not content with having selective hearing, professing his love for Adolf Hitler and groping news reporters left right and centre, Arnold Schwarzenegger has made another gargantuan mistake that could jeopardise his entire campaign.

In an interview with a TheSpoof reporter about the recent ?groping' scandal, Arnie has admitted that he just "Loves Boobs."


"I could see her chest inside her tight pullover. It looked fantastic; it was big and so soft. I just had to squeeze them. I love boobs a lot, they fascinate me so much. They look deliciously sweet like an apple and feel so soft and smooth." - Arnold Schwarzenegger


Almost all of the women we polled insist they are shocked by Arnie's remarks, although a staggering 76% commented they would like Arnie to feel their breasts and 72% said they would like to sleep with Arnie.

I asked Mr. Schwarzenegger if he could comment on my colleague's interview. "I know that if you leave dishes in the sink, they get sticky and hard to wash the next day." He began, "I love the Hong Kong style of action movies, but that only looks good for small guys. In the beginning I was selfish. It was all about, ?How do I build Arnold?' ?How can I win the most Mr. Universe and Mr. Olympic contests?' I would rather be Governor of California than own Austria."

We then asked him where he stood on child education policy but claimed he couldn't hear us over the noise of the near-by road.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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