President Barack Obama is secretly mulling taking action against the oppressive regime in Luxembourg. The President is unhappy with the way Grand Duke Henri is treating his people.
"The people of Luxembourg need hope. They need change. And I am the man to bring it to them!" the President was overheard saying yesterday at a White House Bar-B-Q.
When advised he was already engaged in 3 wars, Mr. Obama said, "Well what's a 4th matter?" and then he put down his cornbread and slammed his fist on the table stating, "Let's do it!"
Luxembourg's Grand Duke when advised of President Obama's plan merely stated, "The Americans will face defeat if they dare try an attack! We will defeat them in the air, on the ground, and upon Lac de la Haute-Sure Stauseigemeng!!!"
(It should be noted that Luxembourg's Air Force consists of 2 gliders, 113 kites, and a remote controlled helicopter. It's Army has 863 enlisted men who only carry batons. And it's Navy is 3 inner tubes, 14 canoes, and 7 kayaks.)
Republican John Boehner issued the following: "I...[sniff]..don't...[crying]..don't think..[ba-hahh]...this is a good idea [whaaa!]. Mr.Boehner was overcome with emotion and had to leave.
We'll keep you updated on this story.