Written by dutch
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Thursday, 31 March 2011

Hugh Laurie has played Charlie Parker in an episode of "Two and a Half Men". He tells a police officer that his niece won't be 'caught' shop-lifting again and that she is his favourite tax "write-off".

Sheen has made an 'epic' deal and has organised for a Charlie Sheen talking 'action toy' to be created. The toy will feature in the latest Toy Story film where he will be the 'anti-hero'. The same toy company 'boffins' that created Buzz Lightyear and Woody 'the Cowboy' are developing a talking, indestructible Charlie Sheen action figure; that will say "Winning" when a string is pulled in its back.

Sheen has donated a sample of his blood to biochemists so that they can create an 'indestructible' clone of the 'warlock' and find out what is in the 'tiger's blood' flowing through his vein.

It has been rumoured that Japanese scientists would like to 'clone' Sheen and make some 'radical' clones to clear up the 'toxic exclusion zone' around the Fujimoto nuclear station.

Meanwhile Sheen is displaying his usual bi-polar self-indulgent behaviour. He had declined an offer of a free private aeroplane flight to a mental health clinic for the 'help' Chuck Lorre says he so 'desperately' needs.

The star is showing the classic symptoms of bi-polar behaviour and in his refusal to admit his illness is displaying a classic symptom of the illness.

In his latest rant Charlie said he loves his life, "What's not to love, it's my life…WINNING!" and he is clearly in denial.

Psychiatrists are getting increasingly worried about Sheen's behaviour and about his 'rants' on Twitter. They are worried that he could end up destroying himself and is potential suicidal.

Parents all across the States are blocking Sheen from their children's internet sites. The joke is growing increasingly 'thin' and people are tiring of Sheen's 'rants' and erratic behaviour.

Shrinks are saying it is because people can not accept that their favourite stars could suffer with mental illness and hence want to 'block it out' rather than 'deal with it'.

Sheens Road Show is starting in a few days in Oregon and he is having a musician to accompany him. The actor is not a singer or a stand-up comedian so it difficult to see what he will talk about apart from his "Bi-Winning" rants.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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