The snake missing from the Bronx Zoo has been found at the site of the Conservative Iowa Caucus! No one can determine how the snake made it from New York to Iowa but speculation is that it somehow boarded an airplane bound for De Moines, possibly assisted by a passenger.
Bill Kristol of the Weekly Standard has denied any responsibility for the arrival of the snake in Iowa but those that know him say he wore his famous smarmy smile when he denied responsibility.
The snake disappeared shortly after the meetings ended and its whereabouts remained unknown until it was found on an airplane bound for New York. By coincidence, Bill Kristol of the Weekly Standard was a passenger on the same American Airlines 747.
The sponsors of the caucus issued a statement saying the incident was not in any way funny and vowing to ascertain how the venomous snake got to their meeting.
In related news, the snake received seventeen percent of the straw poll for president, just ahead of Newt Gingrich, Mike Huckabee, and Michele Bachmann.