WASILLA, Alaska - Todd Palin says that lately he has been spending a lot of his time shaking his head at some of the antics of his wife Sarah Louise.
He took a bite out of his caribouburger and said that he longs for the day when his wife Sarah, was just simply the governor of Alaska.
Todd sat out on his front porch of their Casa Moscow home located on Lake Lucille. He said that last night Sarah had told him that she was going to make Alaska a "No Fly" zone.
He said that he told her that she can't do that since she is no longer the state's governor. He remarked that she got very upset and told him that he must have forgotten that she is a Palin and if it's two things that Palin's have it's ears, tits, and nads.
Todd remarked that Sarah hardly has any free time since most of her time is now spent as a roving reporter for FOX News, the CEO of The Tea Bag Party Movement, the director of The Council To Keep Levi Johnston From Getting Elected Mayor of Wasilla, and the organizer of The Lets Get That Cougar Bitch Kathy Griffin Banned From Television Coalition.
And all the while their middle daughter, 16-year-old daughter Willow's teenage hormones are raging at a speed equal to the speed of an F-14 Navy Tomcat jet.
Todd added that one day last week he had to go up to the school and pick up nine-year-old daughter Piper because she had allegedly body slammed one of her classmates who said that her older sister Bristol "The Pistol" Palin had moved to Arizona because she hated enchiladas.
Todd said that it is an absolute lie because he has personally seen Bristol eat six enchiladas in a single sitting.
He pointed out that Sarah had been asked by Sports Territory Magazine to pick who she felt would win the NCAA "March Madness" collegiate basketball championship.
Todd laughed and replied that his sweet little woman answered that she felt that the Green Bay Packers would repeat and take the "March Madness" championship.
Todd was then asked by Sports Territory Magazine about the rumors that he may be divorcing Sarah. He took the last bite out of his caribouburger, took a drink from his bottle of Corona Light Beer, grinned, and replied that Kate Gosselin sure looked nice when she visited their home a few months back.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Kate Gosselin reportedly told Ashburton Wasabi of The Right Coast Illustrated Revue that she thinks Todd Palin is one good looking man and that if 'Snowflake' ever dumps him she will go after him faster than David Crosby going after the last sandwich at a picnic.]