Written by Flaminroids
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Topics: Florida, Fire

Tuesday, 15 March 2011

image for Florida couple's house burned when matchbook collection catches fire
The Kelly's hope to hoard again

The Hoarder's Digest - Tragedy struck on Thursday afternoon when the home of Ned and Wanda Kelly went ablaze after a grease fire ignited several grocery bags full of matchbooks stored around the stove and numerous closets around the house. The couple's home is considered to be a total loss.

"Our whole life was in that house" said a distraught Ned. "There were so many irreplaceable keepsakes. And the cats, oh my god the cats!"

Due to the volume of old newspapers and books the couple had stacked in several rooms, the fire instantly consumed the house and threatened to burn the surrounding homes. The fire department doesn't suspect arson but the Fire Marshall Pat Flannigan had some words of warning to the couple about possible fire hazards.

"They put a lot of people at risk here" said the 31-year veteran."Thankfully the Kelly's had several vehicles and appliances along the side of the house and that acted like a barrier to keep the fire from spreading."

The couple is hoping that their insurance will compensate them for their collection of milk jug lids and broken vacuum cleaners, but they will more than likely have to settle for damage to the home only.

"I guess we should consider it a blessing" said a hopeful Wanda. "At least we still have the parakeets, oh my god the birds!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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