Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 5 March 2011

image for Jackie Chan Opens Up His First Chinese Restaurant - The Sock & Roll Chinese Diner
Jackie Chan's new Chinese restaurant, The Sock & Roll Chinese Diner (Photo courtesy of Bristol Palin).

VENICE BEACH - Jackie Chan, who is considered one of the greatest martial arts stuntmen of all time, has announced that he has gotten into the restaurant business.

Chan said that after talking to his dear friend the recently-divorced Eva Longoria, who herself is a restaurant owner, he decided to open up his own foreign-food restaurant.

Jackie said that at first he really wanted to open up a Chinese laundry but he said that those things are pretty much located on every corner in Southern California.

He then toyed with the idea of opening up an action figure doll exchange store where kids or even grown ups could take in their Carmen Electra Action Figure Doll and exchange it for the more popular Heidi Montag Action Figure Doll.

Chan even thought about opening up an escort service using male and female midgets for people who do not want a long term relationship but who are only looking for a little fun.

He finally decided on the restaurant which he has named The Sock & Roll Chinese Diner.

When asked where he got the name he said that he got the name 'Sock' from the ancient Chinese, Japanese, and Legalese custom of taking off one's shoes while inside a house or building, or in this case a restaurant and remaining in one's socks.

He giggled and said that the 'Roll' part comes from the phrase 'Egg Roll' which is a phrase that the average Chinese adult uses at least 11 times a day.

Jackie Chan's ribbon cutting ceremonies for the grand opening of his new restaurant The Sock & Roll Chinese Diner will take place on Fire of the Dragon Day of this year.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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