Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Topics: Dogs, poor

Saturday, 26 February 2011

The Republican state legislature in Wisconsin passed a bill late last night that would ban anyone receiving public assistance of any kind from having pets. This includes dogs, cats, birds, rabbits (unless for food) and gerbils.

The bill also provided for agents of the state, mercenaries if necessary, to go door-to-door and confiscate all household pets for immediate disposal. Families fought to hide their cherished family members and in some cases fought back with their bare hands. In one instance a mercenary shot a teddy bear a little girl was holding, thinking it was a dog. When questioned, he replied in broken English; "Thought it was dog! Shoot! Bang! Bang! Get promotion?"

Local media is reporting that when Governor Scott Walker heard members of The Humane Society and the ASPCA were coming to the state capitol; he ordered them arrested on sight and placed in an unknown location for interrogation. He reportedly said, "We will not tolerate outside agitators in our state. This is America! There are good guys, and there are bad guys. In this state we, the good guys, get to decided who's who!"

As reports came in that thousands of poor and newly poor families were clogging the borders of the state to get out, many were supposedly seeking asylum in Middle Eastern countries with military dictatorships.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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