Hawaii Governor, Neil Abercrombie, admitted to a reporter that he can find no evidence of Barack Obama's birth certificate in any of the State's archives. Although he claims he personally met "Barry" when the boy was around six years old, he now believes that this encounter was an illusion.
Using philosophical logic based on the existential proof of being, the Governor, pausing to gather himself, conceded that, "if you don't have a birth certificate, you probably don't exist in time or space."
Obviously aware that citizens might panic upon hearing his measured opinion, Abercrombie suggested that "even though Obama might be a chimera, we should bear with him because he appears to show no malice in his governing."
"Trying to poke holes in his policies will do no good," he said. "As you well know, nothing can come from nothing. Therefore, just ignore him, and maybe he will just go away."