While gay people cannot marry in any of these states, all four have been allowing marriages within their own families, a tradition handed down from when there WERE no other people around within 50 miles to marry.
"We thought it over and since we can't let no gays marry here bouts, we reckon we'll have to stop that same-family marriage thingy", stated Elmer Dude of Deer Lick, Arkansas. "Besides, our family always managed to haul off a cousin from the other mountain ever filth generatnation."
"In a way, I'm glad that there simpling marrying simpling, own brother and sister, was more trouble than it was worth", stated Wesley Jenkins and his sister, Mrs. Jenkins agreed.
"I can recall Pa telling us while he took us on our honeymoon to an old abandoned house up in the hills that he was tired of us asking waz we thar yet, waz we thar yet? He threatened to give us a shore-nuff hidin' and make us walk the 45 miles of dirt road", stated Mrs Jenkins.
"Yep", stated Wesley. "And you always get all balled up with that Uncle Palpa and sech. This will improve our kids learnin' too."
"Well, they haint plum idgets now you know."
Ain't done it!"
"Uncle Papaw! Wesley done said our kids waz idgets again!"