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Saturday, 15 January 2011

image for Martha Stewart's Dog Charged With Domestic Violence After Attack

Martha Stewart's dog was arrested and charged with domestic battery[/color] after head-butting his felonious mogul-master, who needed 9 stitches to close up a bloody gash on her upper lip.

Martha was getting ready to leave her NY home Tuesday when she leaned over to "whisper goodbye" to her dozing french bulldog. But Martha says she must have "startled" the dog, because Fang shot upwards and hit Martha in the face ... busting her lip open.

"She'll remember not to let the food dish go empty again," the dog, Fang, said to ASPCA cops who responded to the scene. "I've f--king had it."

Sadly, this isn't the first run-in with pooch-cops for the tough terrier. Fang was arrested in 2002, after losing $83,000 he had invested in Imclone stock, the company that sent Stewart to jail.

Stewart said she forgives the pooch. In fact, she told the media that she will honor him at an intimate dinner party, where she will be serving steaks and chops made from a new type of meat she refers to as "Gou."

Fang is facing up to seven dog years in prison on the charges.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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