The Wall Street Journal reported today that multi-doctorated genius, Viscount Billingsgate, was awarded a patent for his minimalistic micro diaper that may reshape the world insofar as the spraying nuisance of piss-ants who leave watermarks on the sweaters, pants and shirts of unsuspecting people, men and women just like you and me.
For centuries, complaints concerning this smelly product of an ant's bladder have gone unanswered. Finally, driven by the incessant need for a remedy or a real cure for this condition, Dr Billingsgate, using techniques developed in the micro-processing industry, was able to knit together a diaper, approximately the size of a pin head, that would fit snuggly over the rear appendage of the common piss-ant.
Not yet on the market at your nearest Home Depot, expect to find this product in the next few months in the "Ant Control" section of the store. Never again should common-man have to put up with this micro natural disaster.
God bless men like Dr. Billingsgate and Ben Franklin who make this world a better place to live.