Santa, (AKA Chris Kringle) (AKA Saint Nicholas) has been informed by NATO that he and his sleigh have been grounded by request of the US Homeland Security Agency.
The document stated that Santa has repeatedly ignored to respond to request for inspection of himself, his reindeer, and sleigh. The US advised they have credible reports from Germany that terrorist are planning to use Santa as a weapon to cause mass destruction.
NATO issued a non-official statement advising Santa that if he is to disregard NATO orders he would risk being shot down.
In an unrelated twist, Santa has been ordered to pay over 100 million dollars in fines for numerous violations:
1 Operating an unregistered aircraft.
2 Unfair labor practices.
3 Animal cruelties.
4 Operating an aircraft without a license.
5 No travel visa
6 Discriminating against bad boys and girls.
7 Importing products to foreign countries without clearing customs.
8 Failure to pay import taxes.
9 No recent updated health record on file giving clearance to fly.
10 No VISA
11 No flight plans.
12 OSHA violations:
A Not washing hands between deliveries.
B Overloaded sleigh.
C No safety lights.
D Not providing adequate break time's for Reindeer.
E Inadequate training for crash landings.
F Unsafe working environment.
' G No inspection plate on sleigh.
H Unapproved harnesses.
I No Reindeer vaccination records on file for overseas travel.
J No shot records on file.
When asked for any comments, Santa said he was deeply disappointed and was feeling ill.
Stay tuned to Spoof news for any further updates.
Spoof news, your number one news source for any rumors. "We report it, you read it!"
If you find yourself believing the news you read by this reporter, please seek psychiatric help immediately. Although this reporter is a psychiatric nurse, he has never been a psychiatric patient to the best of his knowledge. This is in no way an insult toward any psychiatric patients. This reporter has no prejudice against any person with any type of mental condition, nor is he prejudice against any race, nationally, (If you are a beautiful Swedish model, I love you and promise "I will wear a condom!") ugly people, beautiful people, short or tall people, gender, species, married or unmarried, gay, lesbians, or any other organization and anything or anyone not mentioned here. In other words, this author loves all (beautiful Swedish models especially!") that are out there whether on this or any other planet, solar system, dimension, past, present and future time periods.