Americans were on pins and needles Thursday afternoon awaiting the much anticipated announcement by NASA regarding new sources of astrobiological life here on Earth. Many scientists believed that NASA would more than likely discuss the findings of a new form of life supposedly found in California's Mono Lake which replaced phosphorous with arsenic as one of its building blocks to for its DNA.
However, something even more incredible was announced. A new life form that used neither phosphorous nor arsenic seemed to be inhabiting a dish of eight-month old vegetable soup found crammed to the very back of a refrigerator used by employees at the NASA Space Center on Merritt Island, Florida.
Upon close inspection, the soup seemed to "move" when placed upon a countertop even though no one was touching the container at the time. "It was something right out of the movie 'Alien'" said Peggy Pertnips, the relief receptionist at the front desk of the NASA Propulsion Laboratories facilities. "There was definitely more than one and they appeared to be procreating right before my eyes. It was riveting."
NASA took their discovery to the American people. "We have found alien life here on Earth," claimed Lt. Frederick Anderson, chief research scientist at NASA. "While we were fully prepared to simply report the findings from the Mono Lake research, it was a stroke of luck that this bowl of veggie soup gave us an even more exciting discovery of alien life forms, allowing us to save face and look like the professionals we have always maintained we are as a space research organization."
No word yet on whether or not the Aliens in the back of the fridge are responsible for constructing a crude, makeshift hovercraft out of a month-old slice of meatloaf also found at the back of the fridge.