Written by Inhopeless
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Sunday, 28 November 2010

image for American Bible Belt to Form New Nation
This Guy Lives in South Texas. Which Means He's Still Technically a Real, Live, American Cowboy.

DALLAS, TX - A consortium of the southern states has split off from the United States of America.

The new country will be accepted into the United Nations, and will be named the Union Provinces of Christ or the UPC.

This will reduced the number of American states to 41 states, with Texas south from Austin still part of the original USA. The new arrangement of American states will make Florida entirely cut-off from the states across the 'Bible Line'. The new nation-state will be based around the Confederate States of the pre-civil war, bar of course the one and a half states already mentioned.

The new nation will elect Jesus Christ as Prime Minister with God as the King, however, Leo the puppy will be mortal ruler of the Union Provinces.

"This is good," said Bob Hill, speaking in Washington after Congress ratified the Christian's Bill. "We're free from the brain-washing liberalism at Washington, with their fancy global warming, and their fancy human rights. Next thing you know, they'll say that them mooslems are actual people!"

This will also lead to a Democrat-controlled Congress in Washington, which will still remain under USA territory, along with West Virginia.

How have American people reacted to the news?

"Oh good," said a New Yorker. "Finally, I don't have to hear their stupid stubborn, wrong ideas any more."

Obama was said to have secretly danced in the Oval Office after 'getting rid of those nutters'. Of course, he can say anything about them, now they're not his people any more.

The UPC has asked for aid from America, but Congress, with a wry smile has denied a grant, stating: "The UPC is a westernised nation, who has many natural resources."

However some United Nations Peacekeeping troops have been deployed in the UPC after the nation passed a law barring 'blacks, Jews, gays, Muslims and communists, and the petty liberals' from living in the UPC, stating 'death by electro-shock' will occur.

We tried to get our man into the UPC, however, he is not allowed into the nation as he is not white, or right-wing or Christian.

Make Inhopeless's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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