Written by Q. William Bacon
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Friday, 26 November 2010

image for North Korea Conquers U.S. during National Food Coma
North Korea anticipated U.S. defensive lapse

WASHINGTON - The Unites States is now under the rule of a North Korean occupation force of one million troops. In a carefully timed midnight raid, the North Korean military successfully executed Jag-eob Teulibtopan (Operation Tryptophan), easily seizing all governmental, defense, and communications centers in the nation.

The invasion set off alarms across the extensive and technically advanced American defense network. However, senior officials could not be roused from their sleep due to excessive Thanksgiving feasting on the previous day. Thus, an American defensive response was never ordered nor coordinated.

The only successful counter-attack came in the pre-dawn hours, as North Korean infantry battalions securing malls were easily overrun by holiday shoppers.

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