Written by Dr. Billingsgate
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Topics: Sex, Women, lice

Wednesday, 24 November 2010

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According to a newly published survey by the Billingsgate Institute, most British women would pick body lice before sex. Although limited to women between the age of 15 to 45 polled after returning from Holiday from Italy, Spain and Greece, 76% of those surveyed said that the cleanliness standards of men from those countries suck.

According to one distraught 43 year old, who admitted that she went to Italy primarily to have sex with men with "more pigment than your typical London white pub rat." Adding, "I was turned off by what passes for foreplay there, watching crabs and other very nasty critters doing crossover drills from one ball to the other."

Another young lady, a student at prestigious Cambridge University, said that it is standing joke that, "if your sex partner has less than 50 crabs jumping around, he is most probably a virgin."

As for whether or naught the surveyed women would pick body lice before sex, 92 percent answered, "yes" and that, in most cases, "it was more fulfilling."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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