Written by Dr. Billingsgate
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Friday, 10 December 2010

image for Charlie Sheen Arrested For Sniffing Model's Bicycle Seat
Sniff This, Senor Sheen

Charlie Sheen is on a roll. Last week he was arrested for demolishing his hotel room with police finding a cowering porn star prostitute fearfully cowering in a locked closet in order to avoid the crazed wrath of the drug crazed star.

Just one week later, international model Ceci Bettencourt, readying herself for her morning bike ride in Central Park, surprised Sheen as he was bending over to sniff her bicycle seat. Not that this should surprise anyone, Charlie Sheen has admitted to having this fetish, and quite frankly, is not ashamed to admit it.

Ceci, however, was neither amused nor impressed when Sheen introduced himself to her. Using the impish grin that has gotten him out of hundreds of potential debacles, Charlie got down on his knees and went for the source of the bicycle seat's scent. Luckily for Ceci, she was wearing fashionably contoured Gucci leather riding britches that proved impermeable to Sheen's ravishing attempt to seek Nirvana.

It took two mounted policeman to dismount Sheen from Ceci's bicycle as he made his escape attempt. He is now free on $1,000,000 bail, but hopeful that he can keep the bicycle seat for a souvenir.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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