Written by Q. William Bacon
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Saturday, 13 November 2010

image for Al Qaeda Regroups in Empty Desert of Foreclosed Homes
Suburbs of Las Vegas, NV

LAS VEGAS, Nevada - For the last two years, the Las Vegas metro area has suffered the highest rate of foreclosures in the nation.

"It's a ghost town out there," explains Capt. Abel Rodriguez of the Las Vegas police. "No street lights, no people, unfinished construction collapsing around you, swimming pools turned into green swamps. It's like the Wild West again. Even the cops are scared to go there."

Federal Homeland Security officials are not surprised that Al Qaeda fighters have found sanctuary in the uninhabited sprawl of abandoned homes surrounding the downtown area.

"Without electricity, there's no air conditioning. Only die-hard desert warriors could survive Nevada with no a/c," noted Rodriguez. "We would try to capture them but we don't know which of the thousands of foreclosures they're hiding in. And, like a senior citizen, a war-hardened jihadist would rather die than get evicted.

"So we wait until night, the only time Al Qaeda operatives come out. But in Vegas everybody comes out at night. And the casinos are already filled with Arabs carrying bags of cash, so the insurgents are camouflaged. Frankly, I don't see how we can win."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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