Negative campaign advertising during the recent midterm elections injected $800 billion into the American economy.
"The combination of a glut of billionaires, low taxes on billionaires, and a Supreme Court decision allowing anonymous campaign spending by billionaires gave our recessionary economy a much-needed lift," stated Timothy Geithner, US Secretary of the Treasury. "Critics said the rich don't help the economy because they save instead of buy," Geithner added giddily, "but it turns out there is something they want to buy: Elections!
"And the jobs that were created were American jobs," Geithner notes. "When a candidate needs to call a million voters and present a fake survey whose questions slur his opponent, he's not going to hire a call center in Mumbai."
Economists are already discussing a second, much larger stimulus in 2012. The Congressional Budget Office predicts that negative advertising during the next election cycle will top $2.1 trillion, or %15 of GDP, assuming current levels of acrimony. Thus, Mr. Geithner has cause for optimism. "I have every confidence that we can insult our way out of this recession."