Written by UWGB-Beek
Print this

Saturday, 6 November 2010

New York--Oil Companies wanted to thank Americans for helping elect Republicans by raising gas prices. The higher gas prices are due to the fact that oil companies don't have to worry about any regulations or new environmental tax increases.

"I was worried that I would have to pay more taxes on all the money I make by ripping off the American consumer that relies on gasoline to get them around. Sure, I don't need to raise the price, but I need to make more profits, because I need a new Mercedes." Ben Harris Jr. an oil company CEO for Exon Mobil, said to reporters.

"If Democrats stayed in control for another two years, well, I wouldn't be able to make the record profits I was making while George Bush was president. I really was starting to miss those profits. I don't think I could have waited another two years to see them again." Mr. Harris added.

Oil Companies deny that they are doing anything wrong by manipulating the market, but as the economy lags, and demand for gas doesn't seem to be realistically growing, but that isn't stopping the price from hitting new highs for the year.

Make UWGB-Beek's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 3?

9 15 22 19
57 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more