SHERMAN OAKS, California - Lisa Marie Presley was sitting in a booth at a local Pizza Hut having a large pizza that had been run through the garden.
As she took her third bite she angrily remarked to an unidentified lady friend that she cannot understand why it is that she has gained so much weight as of late.
The friend just smiled politely. Lisa Marie became very upset and she asked her to please pass the damn Parmesan.
The only daughter of the king of rock and roll Elvis Presley then remarked that she has been feeling extremely depressed due to the fact that she can now fit into some of her friend Kirstie Alley's clothes.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Kirstie Alley tips the scales at 409.]
Lisa Marie, who is 42, did confide to her personal eyebrow plucker, Trixie Pappawordy, that she knows that she has to do something about her tremendous weight since she is starting to look older than her own mother Priscilla Presley who is 65.
In other news. Jon Stewart says that he wants to apologize for referring to President Obama as 'dude.' He pointed out that he meant to refer to him as 'bro.'