Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Oprah Winfrey

Saturday, 30 October 2010

image for Oprah To Prohibit The Use Of The Word 'Bitch' On Her Oprah Winfrey Network - No Word As Yet On The Words 'Ho,' 'Skank,' or 'Slut'
An unidentified member of Oprah Winfrey's Proper Wording Committe which has banned the use of the word "Bitch."

CHICAGO - The queen of the talk shows Oprah Winfrey has just announced that she has issued an entertainment media directive that the word "Bitch" will not be used on her network.

Winfrey's Oprah Winfrey Network has mandated that any guests appearing on any of the OWN shows understand fully and completely that the use of that horrible "B" word will not be tolerated.

A spokesperson for the network Floquell St. Washington stated that Winfrey considers the "B" word to be just as bad as the "N" word.

Mr. St. Washington added that any guest using the dreaded "B" word will also be fined $1,000. He did point out that the shows will employ a seven second delay system, so the home viewers will not hear the banned word, but the studio audience will.

When asked about other words such as "Ho," "Skank," and "Slut" Mr. St. Washington shook his head and said that Miss Winfrey has a Proper Wording Committee that will be writing up a list of words that cannot be used.

He did say that he feels certain that the words "Ho" and "Slut" will be on that list, but he noted that he was not 100 percent sure on the word "Skank."

In other news. The government of Turkey has stated that they are cancelling their planned invasion of Costa Rica due to the recent Costa Rican Banana Epidemic.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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