Washington, DC-- The head of the National Radio Peoples (NRP) has seen the light, and will be sending out refund checks to any and all dissatisfied customers. NRP made headlines last week, when it fired a reporter for eating a bologna sandwich in front of a photo of a Muslim.
Vivean Shriller heads the publicly funded NRP, and made the announcement by memo . Refund checks will be $10,000.00 each.
"We have herd (sic) from are (sic) unhappy pubic (sic). Sew (sic) wee (sic) will male (sic) refund Czechs (sic) two (sic) them. The principal (sic) thing too (sic) remember is that the customer is always write (sic)."
Ms. Shriller has seven post-graduate degrees from all the ivy-league universities. She has served in the Clinton and Obama administrations as an education czar and policy advisor, and makes $2 million a year in salary.
"Eye (sic) want two (sic) make shore (sic) know (sic) won (sic) has there (sic) feelings hurt buy (sic) the National Pebbles (sic) Radio. Sew (sic) pleas (sic) except (sic) my apologies."