At an early morning news briefing, Barack Obama indicated that he is putting "all the wheels in motion" to cancel the upcoming elections in November.
"Nancy and Harry and I have been discussing the upcoming elections, and we feel it would be too costly to hold elections at this time. This is a "cost saving" move only, and has nothing to do with predicted outcomes," Obama stated. "The savings alone here could put fuel in Nan's plane for almost a year," he further stated.
As a result of this announcement, the controversial statement has created a cloudburst of criticism from various candidates and political parties.
Sarah Palin was contacted for a comment. "I haven't had my coffee yet, did any of you guys see Bristol on Dancing with the Stars," was her early morning comment.
Nancy Pelosi, who wanted her comments to be "off the record," stated, "Hey, those stupid voters aren't going to take my job away from me, I like the plane, the power and all those fat ass politicians sucking up to me, I payed for it, worked hard for it, and as that song says, 'Nobody Does it Better' than me. No election, I still got the power, baby."
Harry Reid was unavailable for comment. His office indicated he was in Las Vegas soliciting support at the various casinos in town. He was also speaking at a convention of Mafia Dons being held in town.
Michele Obama was also unavailable for comment as she was preparing the family for a vacation trip to Chile. Rumor has it that the Disney people are considering an amusement park at the site of the recent cave-in, and the Obama's are considering investing in the project.
Michele stated, "Barack is hoping that the interest created there, and generating a billion viewers on TV will still yield a hefty TV audience when he announces the project on TV.
He still feels really bad that he could not somehow capitalize on the event. As we watched the rescue, I noticed tears on his cheek, and thought how sensative he was, until I heard him say, 'Damn, I wish I could be there, all that exposure."